Why CrossFit Ruined My Life

Today I’m gonna talk about how CrossFit ruined my life.

I know, I know, it sounds crazy, but hear me out.

I used to be a normal dude, just chilling, lifting weights and doing cardio, you know, the usual stuff.

But then one day, my friend convinced me to try out a CrossFit class, and the rest is history.

At first, I thought it was just another fad, but oh boy was I wrong.

I’m now addicted to sports and fitness.

I can’t go a day without doing some sort of physical activity, whether it’s lifting, running, or doing some crazy WOD.

I’m now part of a cult.

I wake up early every morning to meet my fellow comrades in the box.

I never thought I’d be the kind of guy who would get up at 6am to work out, but now I do it without even thinking about it.

Damn CrossFit.

I’m also poorer.

I spend so much money on CrossFit related stuff and materials, like fancy hand grips, backpacks, and jump ropes.

And let’s not forget about the monthly membership fees.

It’s like I’m bleeding money, but I can’t stop.

I’m now strong and more flexible than ever before. I can’t control my strength and I keep breaking things.

I also can do weird things like handstand pushups and useless tricks like muscle ups.

It’s like my body has transformed into this superhuman machine, and I can’t go back to being a regular dude.

But the worst part of it all?

The lingo.

I can’t speak like a a regular Joe anymore.

CrossFit cult has its own language, and I can’t stop using it.

I’ll be at work, talking to my boss, and I’ll say something like, “Yeah, I crushed that WOD this morning. My Fran time was insane!” And then I realize that nobody knows what the hell I’m talking about.

So yeah, CrossFit ruined my life.

If you’re thinking about trying out CrossFit, be warned.

It might just change your life forever.

Don’t sign up for that class, you’ll regret it.

I hate you CrossFit

Why CrossFit Ruined My Life

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